


Even Back Then

by KuroBakura



Category: Good Omens
Genre: Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley-centric (Good Omens), Diary/Journal, M/M, Memories, Out of Character, POV First Person, Post-Almost Apocalypse (Good Omens), Romantic Fluff, Secret Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-05
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-10-05 06:44:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20484581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KuroBakura/pseuds/KuroBakura
Summary: Crowley needed to vent and what than a better way is to do with the journal that Aziraphale gave him as a gift.





	Even Back Then

Crowley sat at desk as he wrote down in his journal. It was something that Azirpahale suggested he do when he felt like something was wrong it needed to vent. Today, a certain thing was on his mind and in his journal, Crowley wrote down his thoughts.

** Crowley’s Journal Passage: **

_Back in the garden of Eden, even if we were on opposite sides, I could not help the way that I feel about you. I have always have since I first met you. Everything about you fascinated me and much more. And everything about you I love so much. Truly, neither you nor I are different from one another, my dear Aziraphale. Inside and out, there is nothing about you that I would change. From the very top of your head to the bottoms of your feet, you are perfect just the way you are, my dear. Throughout all these years, my love for you has never died either._

_From when we first me, I knew that there was something about you that would change me. Whether it was good or for bad, I never would regret it. And I was right. I feel in love with you overtime. No angel or demon can pry me away from you. I want you for myself and no one else. Nor there is anyone else that can have my heart either. You are my one and only love, Aziraphale and I wish that I could tell you so simply. As a demon, I may break the rules but I only do it for you. It may sound like madness but when am I not mad? The answer is always, darling. Always._

_The world could end in chaos and if you only lived, that is all I would ever need. You are my world, sweet angel of mine. I just hope that one day that I can tell you how I truly feel. My heart aches every time that I try to sum of the courage to do so but end up chickening out. It seems like it would be an easy thing to do but truly, it is not. Or I thought it would have been easy at first but found out that it was definitely not at all. And for 6000 years, I have been wanting to be yours. I hope one day that this will happen for us. But if it does not, I will still be by your side in other ways and protect you. Even if it means to take my own life in the process. Because that is how much you mean to me. I love you, Aziraphale and I will say it over and over again if that is what it takes. I love, you, I love you, I love you! ...If only you could see that. Maybe one day you will._

Crowley finished writing the sentence as he heard Aziraphale coming into the room. He quickly closed his journal as the angel appeared. Aziraphale smiled as he saw the journal peaking out from underneath the demon’s hands.

”I see that you are using that journal I gave you.” Aziraphale spoke up. Crowley was deeply blushing across his face as he nodded but he did not turn to look at him. Azirpahale walked over to him and placed one of his hands on top of Crowley’s. Aziraphale’s touch made Crowley feel all sorts of things. Also, a tear stared to form in one of his eyes. He wanted to take the angel’s hand and kiss it badly but he had to hold back his urges. Aziraphale caught a glimpse of the demon’s face.

”Are you alright?” Aziraphale suddenly asked. Crowley looked at him, trying to make sure that Aziraphale did not notice the tear streaming down his cheek.

”Yes. I am fine.” Crowley replied to him. Deep down was not totally fine but at the same time, Crowley was not lying to Aziraphale. He did feel okay but yet...venting in the journal made feel things that he rarely felt at all. It was both wonderful and painful at the same time.

”Would you like a glass a wine?” Aziraphale offered him. Crowley smiled. 

“That does sound nice. Any kind would be wonderful. Thank you.” Crowley replied to the offer. Aziraphale blushed when Crowley said “thank you”. He never heard the demon tell him that before. But...it made him feel delighted, too. Aziraphale smiled suddenly.

”I will be right back.” Aziraphale said to him then walked away to go get the glass of wine for Crowley. All of a sudden, Crowley stood up.

”Let..let me help you with that.” Crowley offered. Aziraphale blushed even more.

”Are you sure?” Aziraphale asked another question, feeling a little confused now about what was going on with Crowley. Crowley nodded back.

”I am very sure, angel.” Crowley said back to him. Aziraphale was not going to ask any more questions about this. The two of them headed into the main area and enjoyed a bottle of wine together. As much as Crowley wanted to tell Aziraphale how he truly feels about him, once again, he held it back. For now, Crowley guesses that when the time is right, he will let him know but _when_ is the better question. After all, they will have many, many more years together. 

**The End**


End file.
